What is Gossip? And are you partaking?

Have you ever been in a conversation and someone you mutually know comes up and you start to talk about all sorts of things, good or bad, little or big details you may know about them? Yea, I have too, and more often than I really wish I could say I didn’t. I think what’s amazing is that now, more so than ever, I have these moments where the Holy Spirit has opened my eyes to it, and is teaching me to stop it.

Gossip has been a big part of my journey in following Jesus, because I know He tells us several times in the Bible that it is a Sin. I have tried countless of times to get an official definition of what gossip is so that I can stop partaking in it.

I’ve prayed about it, and have felt like God put it on my heart that Gossip is really: talking about someone else who simply is not present to be a part of the conversation.

I’m also learning how incredibly hard that is. David and I have family and friends all over the world, and to NOT talk about someone who is not present, can be difficult and almost impossible. So I’ve dug deeper into the subject matter to learn more about it and have, indeed, discovered more!

What is gossip according to the Bible?

The best place to learn about what IS gossip, is our primary source: The Bible. Interestingly, the Bible actually has several types of gossip. There’s an amazing website I also use as reference and that is Gotquestions.org, on their website they define gossip from the Old Testament as follows:

“One who reveals, one who goes about as a talebearer or scandal-monger.”

To be a gossiper is to be someone who was given privileged information about people and proceeds to reveal the information to those who have no business knowing it. The website further continues to distinguish what gossip is fully about by categorizing it into two sorts:

1.) Intent. Gossipers often have the goal of building themselves up by making others look bad and exalting themselves as some kind of repositories of knowledge.

2.)The type of information shared. Gossipers speak of the faults and failings of others, or reveal potentially embarrassing or shameful details regarding the lives of others without their knowledge or approval. Even if they don’t intend in harming them, it is still gossip.

The Bible has 5 categories of types of gossip:

1.) Gossip - to share information of others or a situation that is not yours to share.

2.) Slander - sharing information to hurt, distort, or shame others.

3.) Backbiting - using information to argue pointlessly and hurt another or others.

4.) Talebearer - someone who uses all information to make a good story.

5.) Scandal-monger - sharing information that stirs up fear, doubt, and even hatred towards others, which leads to groups being hurt or even scandal.

It’s funny, my immediate reaction is “ouff I would never do that!” Ha-Ha. Like come on, who am I fooling. In the heat of a moment, who doesn’t run with it? It’s after-all part of the sin/fallen nature and God obviously placed it in the Bible S-E-V-E-R-A-L times as a reminder, because … well, we ALL DO IT.

But do not loose hope, He helps us to Re-new our minds, and we CAN stop doing it, with practice.

Romans 12:2

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Can I get a HALLELUJAH. We aren’t old dogs who CANNOT learn new tricks. We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us. Yep, that too is a scripture <3

How to stop Gossiping

Ok so we know what is gossip, but how do we stop it?

My New Year’s resolution was too stop all gossiping. I have discovered that the best way to do it, is firstly RECOGNIZE IT. I can officially say I am better at not initiating it. When I do, I apologize and let the other person I can’t continue because it is gossiping. But if I am not the person initiating it, there are things you can do to stop it.

If it’s news from an outside source, don’t listen to it if you can avoid it.

If its a discussion, well I personally start praying that God will give me the right words and thoughts to go through it and not offend the other person I am having the conversation with, that the conversation needs to either stop, or change subjects. Because it was brought on by the other, I have the choice to disengage, and bring them closer to Jesus. That’s right, AN OPPORTUNITY TO DO HIS WILL! Yay!

So recap:

1. Recognize and apologize if it was you who brought it on.

2. Pray and give it to God

3. Ask God for His knowledge, wisdom to deal with situation, and Holy Spirit to intercede and bring the other person closer to the Lord

4. Tell the other person that you hear them, and find a kind and loving way to let them know why you can’t continue the conversation.

5. Find a way to share your testimony on how Jesus is helping you with gossip.

Don’t take these suggestions for face value. Pray about it. I’m still in the process of learning how to do this myself, and it is NOT easy. I have offended others and made others feel unheard, shamed, and even criticized. I have even been laughed at, ridiculed, and told that I was being too sensitive. But I rest confident that God knows my heart and my intentions. The best thing to do when it doesn’t go well when you address the issue of gossiping is to apologize and be honest with the other, and FORGIVE THEM RIGHT AWAY in your heart if they did hurt you. It might not make anything better immediately, but at least you did your part in standing up for righteousness and gave it to God to work in the other person’s heart about the issue. I have seen Him move AMAZING mountains I didn’t think could be moved. Gosh, He is so amazing. Thank You Jesus.

We can’t control other people’s choices, or even their reactions, but we can control ours. One day at a time. Pay attention to what the day brings you, and handle them with His love, His compassion, and For His glory, and I promise you … It ALWAYS works out for good. Someone said this to me the other day and I absolutely love it: “you might be the only bible someone gets to ‘read’ today” -Think about it. We are His followers and are suppose to represent His goodness, light, love, and truth. Why not make sure it matches who He is?

I’ll make another post that will have at least 40 scriptures that talk about Gossip and if you are interested in meditating on them, I pray He reveals to you the areas in your life that might be given into the temptation. I pray in the mighty name of Jesus, He delivers them all from you and gives you the power, strength and understanding to grow from it all. Amen.

Love you all, until next time <3